I've Got Fucks to Give
Quarter to one in the night, and I stumble across this beautiful song again. It's "I've No More Fucks To Give" by Thomas Benjamin Wild Esq. Lyrical and melodic beauty. And one I wished was my anthem. No. Just.. no. Sure. I used to be someone who did not give fucks. That was ages ago. Thousands of miles ago. So far away that I now use miles and not kilometres. It was another me. A younger, more carefree me. Someone who was under the shelter of my parents. Someone who was still in a shell. It's easier to be bold when you have armour around you. But now? I've realised I'm someone who always gives fucks. Someone who, despite how misused my fucks have been, will still dish them out, served on a platter. It's just who I am, I now understand. I'll always care a lot. About a lot of things. About that one kind lady who let me cut the queue at Tesco because I only had milk to buy. About that lady who happily talked to me while giving me the covid jab. About someone who, I think, finally appreciates me for what I've got to offer. Someone who literally chose me. I care about things as well. That one pair of socks that are lucky. That one small diversion on my commute that ensures I have a good day at work. The wallpaper on my phone which gives out a good vibe to me. Whatever it is. I care. I give fucks. And I have an endless supply of it. I'm rich in fucks. I'll always give fucks about things I deem worthy. No matter how that fuck is reciprocated or received. Not in a selfless or humble way, no, but because I know I will still care despite being used. And I think I am stronger for it. I'm a better human, because of it.
I don't think it is cool or edgy to not care.
To care is to give fucks, and to give fucks is to be stronger. Be better. Be alive. Make no mistake. I'm here because I give fucks. And I'm happy where I am. I'm Vish, and I have lots of fucks to give.